temptation

Yeah...i got two..one for this afternoon!

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starving

I dont know why but i am starving this morning and craving a burrito so i ordered one from the cafe. Hopefully its good...i shouldnt be hungry but i am starving. I am so far away from the cafe maybe i should have ordered two...lol

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move at work

Moved buildings at work...so distracted now because everyone is new and i have never sat over here before. Its not so bad.

Went camping over the weekend and it was fun! I really had a good time. Didnt even mind being dirty. K even got up to help me with the fire when i got up earlier than everyone else. He said that he could hear my frustration and came out to help. How sweet was that?

Had a chat with dr. M about these feelings i am having about k b eing nice to me. I dont understand why i cant just be happy with him being nice to me. I dont understand why i feel like he is holdig something from me and he is only being nice to me to soften the blow. I dont have any reason to think these thoughts. She said that until i have evidence to not worry about it and thats true, i shouldnt.

More later

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grrr

Why do people always feel the need to correct me? Kinda pisses me off because im smart. I do happen to know things too...not everything i say is bullshit. Makes me just want to stop talking altogether.

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horrible person

Yesterday, i took out all of my aggression and frustration out on an innocent person without questioning beforehand. Now i feel embarrassed and alone. I really messed up. I think i really might be crazy because i jumped to the wrong conclusion without hesitation.

I have to admit though, i do feel less stressed since i got some of it out. It just needed an outlet and i needed to yell. But now that i know i made a mistake, i just feel really bad. I have to make it up to this person. She says not to worry and she would have probably done the same thing given the same circumstances but that doesnt make me feel any better.

I think i am going to go home early today. I just dont feel like doing this today..i want to crawl under the covers and hide from the world. I think i will try to do a little work this morning...more later

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